my last carpet-related post

ha! i got the stains out! take that, temporary housing nazis.

if you must know, i used oxy clean's miracle foam. and unlike miracle max's chocolate coated pill, this miracle won't take a miracle to work. sprinkle some powder in a glass, pour water over it, stir it up and let it foam. then scrub scrub scrub with a toothbrush and you're good to go.

now, i just have to make sure mimi doesn't puke again (and i don't fall asleep with a glass of red wine in my hand) before i blow this popstand on friday morning. 8/3/07 marks the resumption of my formerly carpet-free life. praise holy things.

cable companies be damned!

2 things i do know:
1. antitrust laws do exist in this country (supposedly)
2. said laws clearly don't apply to cable companies (or other utility providers, for that matter)

why is it that i have only ever had one cable provider choice? doesn't that break tons of laws?

ok, so my lack of cable provider choice doesn't have anything to do with anti-trust laws really, but i just don't understand why i can't get away from the comcast/time warner black hole and i needed to say something about it.

which brings me back to another issue that's been plaguing me. if, in the city of houston (for example), i can choose my energy provider (be it green mountain, reliant, etc.) how exactly does that work? i mean, there is no way in hell that you actually change who provides juice to your house based on where you send your check every month. so they must do something like calculate the total usage for one area, divide that up by provider and then figure out how much each provider has to pay. no, that doesn't make sense. whatever. now you know what kind of stuff i'm thinking about when i'm staring off into space during status meetings. yeah, martin agency, you heard me. i may be an advertising genius, but i don't always pay attention. so there.

planet unicorn

why is this the funniest thing i've seen in a long time???

quote of the day

"my new job is okay. it sucks, but a lot less than my old one."

nicely done, jori.

more carpet woes

so remember a few weeks ago when i went on a tirade about carpet? the score is now even. mimi 2, ryan 2. she has become miss pukey-pants lately for some reason. i know, tmi. at any rate, i need to figure out how to get out of paying for all the damage we're doing. send ideas my way...lord knows i'll need them.

professional advice from me to you

i'm no expert, but i feel that in my years in the working world i have learned a few key lessons that this evening i feel the need to impart to my loyal readers. if that lot still only includes lib, rachel and my family then that's just sad.

1. don't shit where you eat. office romance is very rarely a good idea. you never want to pull a bridget jones "i have to leave my current job because i've shagged the boss" number. note to self: don't shag people you work with.
2. don't burn bridges. when you switch jobs, never tell your former employer to go fuck themselves no matter how much you might want to. you never know a) who will end up being your boss one day, b) if your former employer and future employer have ties of some kind and c)...can't really think of another reason. just be nice. gracefully resign, serve your two weeks and move on to greener pastures.
3. steer clear of office politics. yes, all offices have some sort of politics going on, but it's best to stay out of it. just do your job well and get out the door. if you let the bullshit get to you, you'll wind up washed up and bitter at 27. no, not me. i'm not bitter.
4. stay out of the gossip chain. if, at your company's annual holiday party, you're the girl that gets wasted and engages in some sort of lewd behavior, i'm telling you right now that you WILL be passed over come promotion time. rules of thumb: 3 drink maximum at office functions, don't show too much skin, keep your knees together and see #1 above.
5. make friends with the right people. you can only self-promote so much. if the right people notice what a stellar job you're doing, hopefully they'll drop your name and you'll eventually get recognized. you get my drift.
6. become really good at at least one thing. if you prove yourself indispensible in one area, you'll impress people and maybe save yourself if your employer ever goes through layoffs.
7. all they can say is no. por ejemplo: if you think you deserve more money, just ask. well, make a good case (i.e. bring written examples of how much you rock) and make your boss believe deep down that giving you $50K more a year is the right thing to do...right. but i digress. the worst that can happen is that you get turned down. at the very least, your boss will know you are unsatisfied with your current salary level and may be looking around for a new job. always good to subtly strike fear in the heart of your boss.
8. update your resume every 3 months. never be afraid to get it out there even if you're not ready for a new job. you never know what could turn up. if nothing else, you could get another job offer, wave it in your current employer's face and demand more dough. never done it personally, but if you have please let me know how it panned out.
9. don't be a brown-noser. people can smell a kiss-ass from a mile away. be yourself, people, and if you don't suck at life you'll do just fine.
10. nobody likes a workaholic. work to live and don't live to work. otherwise you'll wake up at 45 and, yeah, you might have $1 million in the bank but you'll be really unhappy. unless you like that sort of thing which means you clearly aren't my friend and aren't reading my crappy little blog.
11. don't be an asshole. just because you might be in a position of power doesn't mean you can treat people like shit. karma's a bitch and will definitely bite you in the ass one day.
12. always wear a suit to an interview. advertising can be pretty casual, but you always want to come across as a professional in an interview, so resist the urge to dress down. cliche or not, it's so true: you never get a second chance to make a first impression.
13. use spellcheck. seems like a no-brainer, but you'd be surprised how many people don't spellcheck emails before they send them out. ridiculous. *note: blogspot.com does not have a spellcheck option.
14. have a firm grasp of written english. every professional has to write a ton of emails, presentations, memos, etc. you can't do that if you're not a decent writer. know how to differentiate between causal and professional writing. i'll give you a hint. this here blog ain't the professional kind.
15. ask good questions. be it in an interview, in a q&a session at a conference or at the end of an internal meeting. ask questions to enhance your own understanding, ask questions to let people around you know that your wheels are turning, whatever. just ask questions.

these are the basics that i live by. i'd love to hear some of yours!

rest in peace, bunky

i received a very sad email today. my sweet grammie who lives in georgetown, texas (a little town outside of austin) had to put her beloved dog, bunky, to sleep. makes me so sad. she was the cutest, scruffiest little girl you've ever seen. we think she was part terrier, but we're not sure what else was in there. whatever she was, she was a total love bug and my little grammie's constant companion. all you dog people out there know how difficult it is to lose your baby, so everyone keep my grammie in your thoughts today.

i'm still here, i promise

sorry i've been a bit absent lately. i spent all of last week lounging on the beautiful beaches of longboat key, florida. such a hardship, i know. as soon as i find the cord to my camera, i will upload pictures.